My journey to become a mother hasn’t been an easy one and has looked quite different from most womens.
I have always dreamed of having children. But, I also had a very fulfilling career and didn’t get married until my late 30s. I was a performer, singer and dancer, and I was lucky enough to travel all over the world doing what I loved to do.
When my husband and I decided we were ready to start having children, after 6 months of trying we had nothing and sought help at a fertility clinic.
Little did we know we were going to be heading down a long road of struggles trying to make our family of 2 become 3.
It’s been a six year long journey filled with:
- 6 rounds of medicated Letrozole Cycles
- 6 IUI
- 2 IVFS
- Over 180 injections
- 1 failed IVF
- 3 miscarriages
- 1 D&C
All of these challenges have led me to where I am today, with one beautiful two-and-a-half year old and a second on the way in early April 2022. I write these facts not for sympathy or attention, because believe me I am truly blessed beyond measure, but I write this to bring awareness and continue the conversation about infertility.
The road of infertility can be very lonely even with a supportive partner. You can feel shame, sadness, stress, failure and defeat which can feel endless. I wanted to share some tips that helped me go through this very difficult time.
First, never give up hope! Being hopeful is extremely powerful and kept me going even when I felt hopeless. My belief that I was meant to be a mom was always strong. I would picture my daughter here with me. It was this image that kept me positive and gave me that extra push when I had nothing left to give.
Second, find your tribe! Seek women who are going through the same things as you. They are the only ones who will truly understand what you are feeling. I’ve met so many brave women, and we have supported each other through our ups and downs.
Third, be kind to yourself! It is so easy to feel like you are letting everyone around you down or that you can’t do the “one thing a woman is meant to do”. I choose to practice positive self-talk and to learn to be patient with myself.
These tips have helped me balance out a very painful time in my life. Holding on to my beliefs and being positive has led me to have this amazing family I have always wanted.
For me, bliss is being a mom and I am forever grateful to be able to have that title.