We are living in crazy times! The world is spinning out of control. There is so much hatred, destruction, racism and death of innocent people. It’s like a black cloud hovers over this planet.
I feel incredibly sad, incredibly scared and incredibly hopeless. I don’t know what to think or who to trust. It is a heavy weight to bear. And yet, my day-to-day life beckons, and I must go on with the business of living it. And thankfully, I can.
But do I give myself permission to laugh, to sing, to dance, to celebrate, to live blissfully when so many people around the world are suffering and living a nightmare of an existence?
The answer is yes! I must! I can protest, I can donate, I can show empathy, but I alone cannot change the situation. For my own mental stability and self-preservation, I MUST practise selfcare - without guilt.
This morning I went for a one-mile swim. Swimming is the sole form of exercise that I am still physically able to do, as I await an impending hip-replacement surgery.
The pool is my happy place, my bliss. When I am in the water, I am weightless and I get some much needed relief from the chronic pain that bears down on my bad hip. I regain my mobility. As I swim, I count the lengths so as not to lose track of the distance I have covered. Each length is devoted to someone in my life that the number represents. I think about that person and I appreciate them.
As I glide through the water I realize that I am not just unburdening my hip of the physical weight, but I am also unburdening myself of the weight of the world that I carry on my shoulders. I am counting my blessings - length by length.
As I emerge from the pool, dripping wet, but energized, I feel lighter. I have many blessings. There IS some goodness in the world and in the people that I am fortunate to have in my life. This realization is a much needed reprieve from the sadness that engulfs me.
We all need an outlet, a distraction, a reprieve from all the negativity in the news, on social media, in the papers. I’m not suggesting that I will turn off the news and live in a bubble. I need to stay informed and I need to talk about it.
The world is in trouble and I am human. I feel it deeply. But, I WILL take a guilt-free break….before I break.
Tomorrow, I shall swim again.