When you first dive into your spiritual journey, one of the most wonderful results is the new level of awareness you experience as you surrender control over the way things ‘have to be’; you go from a place of needing to control outcomes, knowing how everything will turn out, to feeling a sense of ease and going with the flow.
And when you start to do this regularly, the synchronicities that come into your life are absolutely magical.
It’s a lot like the difference between swimming upstream, and allowing yourself to enjoy floating down a lazy river on a raft.
What I mean by ‘surrendering’ is releasing the death grip you have on life - that idea of needing things to be a certain way, and feeling the urge to restrict how situations unfold, which creates unnecessary tension inside you. And quite frankly, it’s absolutely exhausting.
I know first-hand. I spent 9 years in event-planning, so you can imagine how much there was to coordinate and control. I had to stay on top of so many components for each event, and there was always an underlying fear that something might not go right.
At one of my largest events, I supervised over 50 volunteers and two dozen staff members, in addition to multiple suppliers. I had to focus on so many details, making sure everyone had the information they needed. I was really good at what I did.
But I would just about collapse after each big event. It took so much effort trying to hold everything together, and as soon as I was able to, I dropped.
So, how do we let go and embrace a different approach? This is the art of surrender. And there are essentially three steps to surrendering.
Step 1: Create Space
Schedule time for yourself in your calendar, time when you don’t have to fulfill any other responsibilities or take care of anyone else. If you’re a parent navigating work and kids and whoever else you may be supporting (pets, neighbours, loved ones), literally scheduling time in your calendar for you is really important. And also consider a location where you’ll feel like you can be on your own.
To get the most out of surrendering, you’ll ideally want to regularly give yourself 30 minutes to an hour.
This time could be spent hiking by yourself (stay safe, of course), getting up early in the morning before anyone else, or asking your partner to take everyone out of the house so you can have some alone time.
Ideally you want to be on your own, undistracted, to help you focus on you. This also means turning off your phone and stepping away from your computer.
Step 2: Let Go
This is the surrendering part. It can be as simple as giving yourself permission to be fully present.
For example, if you’re walking on a trail, it can mean staying present to your surroundings, listening to the animals and watching the trees.
If you’re on your couch, it could mean closing your eyes and breathing deeply, noticing your breath. This doesn’t have to be formal meditation. The intention is for you to take a break from everything you have going on in your day, to just be.
For me, surrendering began on my living room couch in March of 2010. It was 6 am. The house was quiet. Everyone was asleep, and I gave myself permission to discover what made my heart sing.
That simple intention opened me up to discovering so many new things in my life, and ultimately led to my becoming an Intuitive Business Mentor.
Step 3: Listen
Now that you’re on your own without distractions, pay attention to your thoughts.
Check in with your body; scan it to see how you’re feeling. Any tightness or stiffness anywhere? Do you feel energized or tired?
Notice any emotions bubbling up.
Do you have any flashes of stories from the past that may be keeping you stuck?
Or do you notice things in your surroundings, like a bird that seems to be following you or speaking to you? Or maybe you find a white feather on the trail as you’re hiking?
Writing in a journal is another way to tap into insights that you may not have been aware of before. You might begin with focused writing at first, fully conscious of what you want to write. And as you continue to let the words flow out, you may start to discover thoughts that you hadn’t considered before. Or notice that something has been bothering you, something you haven’t had time to process. Let it all flow out onto the pages.
What you’ll notice is that the listening continues past the moment of writing. As you continue to regularly create the space to surrender, you’ll find that you start to notice more ‘signs’ and synchronicities as you go through your day. You might notice patterns of numbers, or perhaps you think of a friend just before they call.
This is when the real magic begins.
The first time you surrender is like opening the door to what else can be possible in your life. And once you get a taste of it, and discover how wonderful this inner awareness feels, you’ll want to bring it regularly into your day.
A fun, spiritual wonderland awaits you.
We’d love to hear from you! Please send us your suggestions for future articles. And if you’re a writer, please see our writer’s submissions page for details.